Saturday, October 1, 2016

EW I just keep thinking of the Brit Brit movie





I have to say I'm really at one of the WEIRDEST points in my life.  For the first time in I'm 11 years old, I am not a working member of society.

One one hand.....I wouldn't change one single thing about how or why it all went down.  It needed to happen for me.  Here I am at (Ahem) 38 years old and giving this what feels like - a 3rd chance at life.

I almost thank God (which is something I don't do) everyday that this part of my life came after my weight loss surgery.  I think back to when I was heavier and I was afraid to look for other jobs.  For so many reasons:  (1) My TH family accepted me no matter what.  They didn't see my size and they didn't judge me.  (2) I was not confident and it showed.  Even if I got called in for an interview, I don't think I had anything too wear that fit.


I'm so so so very thankful and FUCKING TERRIFIED for this moment.  I don't even have a clue as to what I want to do.  What to go into but I do know, all I want is to find my passion.  I have many loves, and many things that I'm good at but I want my "PASSION"  that thing, deep inside that pushes you to go on even when you are tired or sad because you LOVE IT.

Part of me thinks I found what makes me happy,  It's helping people in some possible way feel confident.  I just have no clue how to go about mixing the two to form, you know a life style.

What would you do if you could do anything?   (I'd marry rich but so far  -  that's fucking not panning out as planned)